His Distance My Procrastination

Most of the time I feel like I am not doing the right thing by my son. Alexander is so difficult and there are so many things that I think would help him, but it seems like it takes so much persistence and energy to make stuff happen. How do I put aside my lethargy and push away my procrastination? One step at a time... One phone call at a time... Tell myself that I will do one thing differently today! He doesnt want to interact with me. He wants me to leave him alone and his behavior makes it so difficult to get past his distance. He is angry and seems unhappy. He is frustrated and I would be too if I couldnt communicate with the world.

Summer with Mommy Dearest

Summer is in full swing. Hubby got a job in FWB again and so he commutes back and forth everyday. Im not sure if I enjoy his constant companionship. I do like my personal time at home, but I do know that he will be home everynight to help out with the children. Yesterday I was totally freaking out because apd took away all of Alexander's Personal care hours. Which meant that I wouldnt have the same amount of help with him. Honestly his behavior is atrochoius. Hitting, kicking, pinching and the worst is biting. Awful! I am trying to get a behavior therapist to work with him, but it seems in this area they have a lot of work and only a few therapists. Its very frustrating. I was able to fix the hour situation... for now. Mentally it is a moment to moment situation. I have to keep reminding myself to stop and reavaluate what actually needs to get done and most of the time it calms me down. Narrowing down the big picture to only today makes things way more managable.