Thursday, January 14, 2010

Magic

When you realize that your life is at a pivotal moment you MUST act! It is now, or you will keep putting it off for who knows how long. Tomorrow, next week, in a month, year... lifetime??? I opened my closet of wonderful supplies: colored paper, paper with patterns, ribbons, buttons, beads, paint, pencils.. everything anyone could want for creating! It hit me. I must start. I must pull out the beautiful bits of magic and use them to make me more of who I want to be. Its amazing that glitter can turn into fairy dust if used to transform ones life into beauty. Art is magical in my life. It answers questions about my soul that I can not get from anyone else. It pulls the person I want to be out into the world and gives my aura a pretty pink hue. I need to do this. I need to be more, or I will fall back into the pit that I have climbed out of... I was wet, dirty and cold, but I have been nursed back to health. It is time to connect with my mind again and see what it holds. What can I contribute to life? Art washes the soul clean from the dust of everyday life!!!

Apathy

Motivation is so difficult to achieve when amidst a veil of apathy. I have 6 hours of quiet time while the boys are away at school during the day. I want to create. I want to make beautiful and sometimes dangerous drawings. I want to write, but when I start to think about it I get all anxious and start to procrastinate. All it takes is getting out the supplies and sitting down with my pencil in my hand. Why does it seem so hard to accomplish? My head starts to hurt and my eyelids get heavy and before I know it I am in bed sleeping the time away. I wake up and find myself disappointed that the day has slipped away.
I did make a huge step by making Dr appointments that I have been putting of for some time now. I even have a date book that I wrote all of my times in. New years resolution was to be more organized when it comes to appointments. So far so good.
I am always in such a hurry to do nothing.

Monday, January 4, 2010

helluo librorum

The New Year's bell is rung. The older child is at school and the younger one is still asleep.
I am overflowing with the need to connect to a person that has my love of bookish topics such as poetry, lyrics and the complexity of words. Beautiful words that create incredible imagery. Words that take the reader to precise places and then enslave you with the emotions and feelings so exquisitely displayed by the writer. That is the most extreme feeling. Understanding it, sharing it. Intimate and raw, bathing in the streams of fantasy woven for our psychological pleasure. A fellow logophile dancing through streams of literature.
So I search you out, a friendship born of literary love and abstract thoughts. A confidant that shares creativity with me and encourages me to explore life with wild abandon...
Where for art thou?